Akatsuki Chaos: Hidan's Build A' Bear troubles
by AA-Meeting
Summary: The first in the Akatsuki Chaos series. The story of hidans eventful days at Build A' Bear. Pansy manager, many profanites, and a not so innocent little girl with a death wish involved. First story ever, please R&R or else we'll send the rabid chickens.


Akatsuki Chaos: Hidan's teddy bear troubles at Build A' Bear.

By: AA-Meeting

Disclaimer: We do not own naruto (well maybe sexualy but thats it).

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Build A' Bear was once a place of joy, happiness, and very expensive teddy bears, plus more. Now it's a place of swearing, crying, and expensive teddy bears, plus much, much more.

It all started with Hidans first day on the job. You see Hidan was one of those S-Class criminals who didn't have much of a soft spot for those little _things_ you and I call children. He especially hated when they started bawling or whining because they wanted one of those ridiculously overpriced pieces of cloth. So why did he decide to work at Build A' Bear if he disliked it so much? Well honestly it was the only job he could get. All the others were too scared to hire him and Build A' Bear wanted him because of the white hair and he looked _fabulous_ in the cute, red Build A' Bear apron with that adorable bear logo on the front.

Hiring him was probably the worst idea Build A' Bear management could have ever had. They assigned him to be the stuffer, or whatever they're called. Many very horrific accidents occurred with him at the post. Example, the teddy bear would blow-up due to over stuffing and thus the child watching would be forever scarred for life because their "best friend' was just blown up. Then Hidan would try to destroy the stuffing machine and damn it to wherever jashin-sama "damns" thing too. It was actually quite funny because no one ever really knew what he ment when he said," Jashin-sama", they just assumed he was speaking a different language.

Then one fateful day, one poor, unlucky little girl came into Build A' Bear with a bear already in her tiny arms. Today was her birthday and her loving parents, of course, took her to Build A' Bear and of course, she managed to pick out the most expensive bear in the store. Only problem, her parents didn't have enough money for this certain stuffed animal and they told their precious daughter exactly that. Bet you can't guess what happened next! She started crying, no not just crying, but wailing. After about five minutes of that, Hidan got annoyed. Then after about fifteen minutes of that infernal noise, Hidan finally snapped.

He marched over to said wailing little girl, ripped the bear out of her hands and that's when it happened.

"Shut the FUCK UP!!! You annoying THING!! This is just a fucking STUFFED animal!!" Hidan screamed.

Then he proceeded to rip off the bears head.

"See nothing but fucking stuffing!! Now shut the fuck up before I pull out all the fucking stuffing out, then I'll find that little red fucking heart, rip it in half and FUCKING EAT IT!! Then I'll give whatever the fuck is left of it to rabid animals as fucking food!!" Hidan yelled with pure murderous intent.

Pity though because this little girl didn't take shit from anyone. So while Hidan was ranting and screaming out profanities and scaring everyone, including the manager. Except for two strange looking girls laughing while hijacking every teddy bear in their site. The little girl took aim and did the unthinkable; she kicked Hidan in the shin.

He was not expecting this at all.

"FUCK! What the HELL you little fucking piece if SHIT!!! I'm going fucking sacrifice your spoiled little ass to jashin-sama DAMMIT!!" Hidan screamed while hopping up and down on one foot.

The little girl just ignored him and walked back to her shell shocked parents with only a small tear in her eye. You may think 'aw poor little girl' but no, this little girl wasn't as innocent as she looked. While no one was paying attention she discarded her mutilated old bear and took the bear she wanted and stuffed it up her shirt, then she casually walked out of the store with her parents close behind.

'Damn things, so fucking annoying', Hidan thought. That was when he noticed a terrified manager coming up to him.

'Fucking pansy', Hidan couldn't help but think.

The "pansy", as Hidan so nicely put it, walked up to him, voice quivering, spoke, "Um Hi-Hidan, We are terribly s-sorry but you're…you're fired…". The poor man squeaked out "fired" like he didn't want Hidan to hear him and he didn't of course.

Hidan turned his head very slowly, a glint of murder in his eyes.

"Who the _fuck _are you fucking firing again, pansy!?" Hidan had that glint in his eyes again and the poor man thought if he said the wrong thing he would be ripped limb form limb, castrated with the stuffing machine, and fed to the teddy bears.

"U-Uh…n-no one s-ss-sir..." the manager said while running back to his office, though he tripped over to many stands on the way there.

"That's want I fucking thought!!!" Hidan yelled at the retreating pansy manager.

All in all, Hidan never got used to his job and he promised himself that he never would. The only reason he did stay, well do you really have to ask. He stayed because the pay was good, duh!!! I know you guys are smarter then this. I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!

**The end for Hidan.  
**(At least for now)

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